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Joke of the Day

"Retarded people They shouldn't even exist"

"How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for his birthday? He felt his presents."

"A man died and the whole country was in mourning then it became the afternoon, followed by the evening and then the night."

"What's blue and doesn't fit any more? A dead epileptic."

"Wouldn't it be weird if you met someone from twitter in real life and all they did is say random one-liners every few minutes?"

"Why did Raggedy Ann get kicked out of the toy box She sat on Pinocchio's nose and said ""Lie to me bitch!"""

"Did you hear the Pillsbury Doughboy and one of the Cabbage Patch Kids had a baby? It was an ugly little fucker with a yeast infection."

"I made my will yesterday and had to make my lawyer the beneficiary because my estate will just about cover his bill"

"I want to start a Bantu Saliva cover band... And call it ""Click Click Boom"". ^I'll ^^show ^^^myself ^^^^out."

"I think Diane knows I was her Secret Santa at this morning's office party, because this afternoon I had to borrow my stapler back from her."