23271

Joke of the Day

"I think Diane knows I was her Secret Santa at this morning's office party, because this afternoon I had to borrow my stapler back from her."

"Why are all Atheists poor? Because Atheism is a not for-prophet organization."

"How much cocaine can a smuggler sneak into prison? a buttload."

"If you are going to send me boob pics, try and save them in the right image format. As a Nerd it's a major turnoff to get a .bmp"

"What does love mean to a tennis player? Nothing"

"as a kid, I used to think $1,000 was a lot of money. But now that I'm an adult, I think it's a tremendous amount of money"

"I've seen: UFOs Ghosts A Two Headed Turtle Kimodo Dragons But nothing is as unbelievable to me as seeing Trump run for president."

"""WE WILL FIGHT TO THE DEATH! After you try this delicious glazed poultry I've prepared for you all."" --General Tso"

"Why don't gay jokes ever get old? Because they get AIDS and die."

"If a tree falls in the forest and kills a mime... ...would anybody care?"