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Joke of the Day

"Why are vaginas called beavers? because beavers eat wood"

"What happens when a dick meets a hardass? Well... Fuck."

"No I don't hate my boss. It's just that I wish his toilet paper was sand paper."

"Question: Why do men always give their penis a name? Answer: Because they don't want a stranger making 95 percent of their decisions for them."

"Caught my food taking a picture of me. When I confronted it, it said it was for its people blog? What a creep."

"What do you call a bunch of black kids playing in leaves? Raisin bran"

"Oh no! I forgot to refrigerate this German sausage! Now it's totally become a spoiled brat."

"Hitler decides to hire a weather forecaster [Hitler] what's the weather looking like today? [Forecaster] Hail, Hitler!"

"Hey, we never talked in high school! Let's be Facebook friends so we can once again never talk! JUST LIKE OLD TIMES!"

"It's that time of year again when I should really check in on my friends with pools or boats to see how they've been since last summer."