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Joke of the Day

"The ugliest baby in the world was just born... they didn't print a birth certificate... they printed an apology letter instead."

"Canada was like, ""This is all part of the Northwest Territories,"" but the Inuit were having Nunavut."

"If we've learned one thing from this whole Ray Rice ordeal, it's that... ...you should always take the stairs."

"Did you hear about the dimwit who went to visit his girlfriend and found she didn't have very much on? He went back nine months later and she had a little moron."

"Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the w's."

"How do you make soup from a computer? It's easy; just throw in a couple of Boolean cubes."

"Waiter I'd like a cup of coffee please with no cream. I'm sorry sir but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?"

"How did Jesus stay in such good shape? Cross fit."

"How many 1980s R & B divas does it take to fix a broken lightbulb? Just one, but they fix the crack by torchlight"

"Why did the negative number look so surprised? He was nonplussed."