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Joke of the Day

"Last night I made love to my wife while camping.... It was in tents"

"What was Carl Sagan really trying to say about the brain? In Soviet Russia, consciousness regulates the cerebral cortex."

"Did you hear about the guy who illegally downloaded Free Fallin' and Refugee? He was charged with Petty theft."

"Why did Frosty the snowman pull down his pants? He heard the snow-blower was coming."

"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea. What do you call a deer with no eyes no legs and no dick? Still no fucking idea"

"I am going to make millions when I finally finish developing this iPhone app that tells you when the traffic light turns green."

"An Indian man on his death bed. ""Sanjita, my wife, are you here?"" ""Yes, my husband.""""My son and daughter, are you here?"" ""Yes, Papa.""""Then who's in the fucking shop?"""

"You know how horny the Romans were back then? For fuck's sake, they even nailed Jesus!"

"What do Stephan Harper and pennies have in common? They're both useless in Canada."

"I hate people who take drugs... ...such as the police and customs officers."