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Joke of the Day

"Damn girl, are you a maple tree? Cause I would tap that, and you have an impressive root structure which is where this metaphor falls apart."

Next Joke
 
"""look, if it's no fancy dress then the funeral invite should have specified no fancy dress. And besides, your aunt loved minions"""
"Wanna hear a cheesy conspiracy? Halluminati"
"What do you get when you inject human DNA into a goat? Kicked out of the petting zoo."
"What's the abominable snowman's favourite food? Spag-yeti."
"Where do people with Ebola go when they die? Bloody hell"
"Quotes to calm an angry woman: 1. Stress makes you fat. 2. My ex never acted like that. 3. I love you, even if you're just like your mom."
"I saw a black guy running from my home with a television I think to myself "" Isn't that mine ?"" Then i realized "" Nope, mine is at home picking cottons """
"A Roman walks into a bar. He holds up two fingers and says, ""I'll take five beers, please."""
"A donkey, a calf and a foal walk into a bar... Its not a joke, it really happened in Melbourne not that long ago"