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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a baby and a kilo of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a kilo of cocaine fall out of a window."

"I found my girlfriend's mute button! It's located on her jugular. Only catch is that I had to use a knife to reach it."

"It's fun to chant ""Bloody Mary"" three times into your car's side mirror while driving at night and watch her jog to keep up"

"Never ask a shepherd how many sheep he owns, I don't think he'd know, he probably falls asleep every time he takes inventory."

"Our Great Dane has been causing quite a smell around my house. Whenever he barks I shit myself."

"Why was Jeffrey Dahmer so healthy? Because he ate five fruits a day!"

"I've kept my New Year's resolutions. 1680x1050 and 1280x800."

"Q: What kind of cards do donkeys send out near Christmas? ... A: Mule-tide greetings."

"Men are like road kill. They usually just lie around until they start to smell."

"What do you call a hippie's wife? Mississippi"