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Joke of the Day

"How do you know when you're turning 40? When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh"

"What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty."

"When I was in college I met a girl at a bar and we exchanged phone numbers... But then every time the phone rang it was for her. It was very confusing and annoying"

"My 83 year old grandfather is still trying to be a successful rapper, his name? Two canes"

"My brother wanted to play cowboys and indians So I put on a ten gallon hat and and chaps and he went to MIT and graduated in computer science."

"On the occasion of Women's Day...my wife decided to take a rest ...so I am the boss for today....."

"I hate it when a bar of soap gets visibly dirty. I want to clean it, but down that road lies madness."

"*goku flies into the sunset* not knowing how the sun and earth really work he says ""WHAT THE HELL WHERE'S THAT SUNSET BEEN FLYING FOR DAYS"""

"What is Bill and Ted's favorite book of the bible? Duderonomy! They also like Leviticus."

"Whats does dissecting a frog and explaining a joke have in common? Sure, you know how it works, but now it's dead."