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Joke of the Day
"Ask me about my vow of silence."
Next Joke
"My new fragrance is called Failure and smells roughly like a bowling alley."
"Okay to tell dead Steve Jobs jokes now? What's the difference between cancer and the middle class? At least cancer got Jobs."
"What's the most dangerous animal in Alaska? Sarah Palin"
"Does Snoop Dog wear and apron when he cooks? Yes, for sizzles. Edit: Snoop Lion"
"I used to have a weird affliction that caused me to alter all my Reddit posts to add the names of my favourite Frasier and Cheers actors but I'm over it now. Edit: Grammer"
"If I had a dollar for every girl that didn't find me attractive... They'd eventually find me attractive.."
"I'll always remember what my dad told me right before he died: ""of course you're supposed to use that much lighter fluid idiot."""
"A man is hospitalized after a serious accident Following his surgery, he says, ""Doctor! I can't feel my legs!"" The doctor says, ""I know. I amputated your arms."""
"I cooked a live Lobster in the microwave and now I have a giant mutant lobster in my living room demanding to watch The Little Mermaid."