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Joke of the Day

"I've never met a weekend that I didn't like."

"How does Amazon Mexico pay its employees? In Jeff Pesos."

"Why did the blonde keep coat hangers under her seat? In case she locks her keys in her car."

"I know a guy who survived an 8000-foot fall out of a plane. Until he hit the ground."

"Not looking at my phone during dinner will be the most romantic gesture I will make today."

"Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car."

"What did the lobster say when he saw the mermaid? Gotta lay off the sea-weed."

"What's difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never paid to have a lentil in my mouth."

"Q: What did the writing utensil take for his high sugar level? A: Pencil-in."

"is this Sara? hi, this is Tom from HS. my god its been years! Anyway, im calling because u changed your HBO Go password & I need the new one"