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Joke of the Day
"Whats the difference between me and my couch My couch pulls out"
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"My wife says I should be a bull rider... Since I'm lucky to last 8 seconds..."
"My hamster died as he lived... in the microwave."
"Friend: Did you know that a butterfly only lives for 2 days? Me: I think that's a myth. Friend: No it's definitely a butterfly."
"[opens fortune cookie] be careful what you wish for [opens another] this is your final warning"
"After 69 Q: What comes after 69? A: Mouthwash."
"TIP FOR MEN TIPS 4 mEN . . . . . . . . . If you marry one girl, she will fight WITH you. . . But . . If you marry with two girls, they will fight FOR you... Think different"
"The phrase ""This shit is bananas"" probably originated from the guy who had to clean out the monkey cage at the zoo."
"friend: let's meet up soon me: *in the crow's nest of a ship docking outside your house* when though"
"If a dentist makes his money off unheathly teeth,why should I trust a toothbrush 4 out of 5 dentist approve?"