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Joke of the Day
"Very dirty joke [NSFW] A pig falls in the mud."
Next Joke
"How do you get around fast on the bottom of the sea? Skates!"
"I've decided to start my own herb garden. I've got a lot of extra Thyme."
"[job interview] ""What's your biggest weakness?"" ""My honesty"" ""I don't think-"" ""I broke into ur house and made love to ur cat last night"""
"A friend that steals your tortilla chips is nacho friend."
"How is your job and your wife different? I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done"
"Windows 8 is like my ex... Looks good, is nice for touch and play, but terrible for the real work."
"How many ears does Captain Kirk have? 3: a left ear, a right ear and a final frontier. (Courtesy of my dad)"
"Sometimes you just have to go with the flow. ~Menstruational Tweet"
"What's your number? A Jewish girl and a man meet in a bar. They hit it off and the man asks for the girls number. The girl lifts up her sleeve."