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Joke of the Day

"Islam is a peaceful religion A piece over there, a piece over there, a piece over here"

"What do you call a cheap circumcision? A ripoff."

"[shows up 2 hours late for interview] Sorry I was trying to get out of a beanbag chair."

"I used to have a friend named Frank... Until one day I asked him: ""Can I be Frank with you?"" Now I no longer have a friend named Frank."

"I have a Russian driving instructor. He tells me to ""Putin to 1st"" but i always end up Stalin."

"What did people call the Nutty Professor before he became a professor? Mr. Peanut"

"""The club can't even handle me right now."" What, like structurally? Should we call an engineer? Evacuate? Advise."

"How do you walk a dog with no legs? You don't, you pick it up."

"What does a cow produce when an earthquake occurs MILKSHAKE"

"I carry a knife whenever I'm running late to work because that's what Counterstrike taught me: ""You always run faster with a knife""."