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Joke of the Day

"During sex, my wife always wants to talk to me? Just the other night she called me from some hotel."

"I wish I loved anything as much as middle aged white women love sharing pictures of words written in sand."

"I wonder if Houdini ever locked himself out of the house."

"What do you call the inhabitants of London? Arabs"

"Doctor and Patient. Doctor: ""I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."" Patient: ""What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"" Doctor: ""Nine."""

"Be nice to a nerd. Prevent a supervillain."

"What do coffee beans say to scare their friends? Brew."

"Missing a period is probably a Grammar Nazi's worst nightmare."

"Where does Q come before P? In front of a busy urinal."

"My fave pickup line as a gay man... Hey, are you a vital organ? Because I don't think I can live without you inside of me."