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Joke of the Day

"My brother took being sent to prison really badly. He was yelling and screaming, took off his clothes, and would not accept any food from anyone. That was the last time we played monopoly."

"A lawyer takes the bar"

"What did the Pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey"

"What the hell is Minecraft? Hitler's lesser known, second, book about his love of knitting."

"What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go to the store without Robin."

"Who was that on the phone Fred? Fred: No one important. Just some man who said it was long distance from Australia so I told him I knew that already and put the phone down !"

"My catchphrase is ""Just smell the money, baby"". I can't use it yet (I don't have money), please don't steal it"

"My morning commute was hectic today. I tripped over a dog toy and almost spilled my coffee. I made it to the couch safely though."

"Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side"

"Give a man a gun and he will rob a bank Give a man a bank and he will rob everyone"