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Joke of the Day

"Last night I went out drinking with some high school friends. About 2 hours into it they were like... ""Dude, shouldn't you be hanging out with people your own age?"""

"What did the cop do when his Sergeant did not grant him the vacation he requested? Shot a black man."

"A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.... Soon after a young boy walks in. The priest says ""lets fuck him!"" The rabbi says ""outta what!?"""

"Did you hear about the new condoms for frogs? They're rrrrribbet for her pleasure!"

"Pro tip: when you have a drug test and they tell you to go to the bathroom in the cup, that means PEE. Always."

"What do you call an obese psychic that works at a bank? A four chin teller"

"How do you know when a politician is lying? When you see their lips moving!"

"i feel like i need to go to rehab for my avocado addiction. :("

"Wanna hear a short joke ? Wanna hear another one ?"

"My girlfriend and I decided we aren't ready for a baby yet, so I double-bagged it. It worked; babies cannot breath through two layers of plastic shopping bag."