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Joke of the Day

"An Elf, a Dwarf, and a Man walk into a bar The Hobbit laughs at them and walks under it."

"Why did hitler kill himself? Because he saw his gas bill"

"While in bed, my girlfriend screamed, ""Oh my god, it's so big!"" Then I saw the spider."

"I'm never gonna tell the person I'm meeting up with that you said hi."

"Why does China have such a large population??? Because their condoms were Made in China."

"Enjoyed 3 minutes and 42 seconds of extra sleep this morning by letting my kids stay up 5 hours past their bedtime"

"Why does a hummingbird hum? It forgot the lyrics."

"My roommate dressed as a syringe for our Halloween house party. He's upstairs with the sexy girl wearing the Courtney Love costume. In the addict."

"People just said ""go to the gym"" they never mentioned that you have to actually do things when you get there I've been doing this so wrong."

"When is the Speech Therapy Class? It's hard to say."