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Joke of the Day

"Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection - except one. He's never gonna give you Up."

"How do you measure the molar mass of guacamole? With Avocado's Constant."

"Straight guys on twitter, If you haven't been hit on by a gay guy on here take a long look at yourself & figure out what's wrong with you."

"If her weight ends in ounces she's too young for you bro"

"I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!"

"Next time at a public swimming pool just stop, look around & ask yourself: ""Is there anyone here that I would want to take a bath with?"""

"Say What You Will About Getting Shot But it always starts off with a bang."

"What did the businessman say to the other businessman? We're both businessmen."

"humer why do squirrels swim on their backs???? To keep their nuts dry!"

"What does a communist prostitute do? Seizes the means of reproduction"