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Joke of the Day

"I really hope to die as peacefully as my grandfather did. Nothing like his passengers, though. They must have been losing their minds before the plane hit the trees."

Next Joke
 
"TWITTER: something just isn't clicking here HORDE OF RACIST EGGS: [cacophony of immoral filth] TWITTER: eliminate the looping video service"
"Where do male army priests live? On Chap Lane."
"Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom ? Captain: Well it could have been worse. Manager: How ? Captain: There could have been more teams in the league !"
"Why did the tennis player get thrown out of his workshop? He was making a racket."
"Dear America Would you please take the 's' off the word 'legos' and put it back on the word 'math' where it belongs. Many thanks England"
"Well son, your mom was the prettiest lady at that entire Gathering of the Juggalos, and I would've traded THREE wallet chains to be with her"
"What did one hat say to the other hat? You wait here, I'm going to go on a head."
"Lake Erie: Great Lake name Lake Titicaca: Greater lake name"
"Whats the great way to lose some pounds? Leave the EU."