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Joke of the Day
"Surprise your coworkers by hiding in the utility closet until you're dead."
Next Joke
"If there's something weird in lands beyond the Wall and it don't look good Who you gonna call? Nine Wun Wun"
"My therapist advised me to feed and water my kids and cook my plants 3 meals a day. And something about listening."
"What's the hardest part about being a Vegan who does Crossfit and owns a Rescue dog? Deciding which to tell people first."
"What did the leper say to the prostitute? ""Keep the tip."""
"Post some more song lyrics as your status. Someone will eventually understand your struggle."
"You've got penis [Cast: a man and a woman.] Woman/man: [bump into each other.] Woman: You've got penis in my vagina. Man: You've got vagina in my penis woman/man: [moan]"
"I'm here to make a donation. Nun: Blessings, the orphans could use... *Shoving my kid at her- A brother? I'd like a receipt. For my taxes."
"I was dating an analog synthesizer But I had to break it off. She was just continuously variable."
"What's the Cuban national anthem? ""Row, Row, Row Your Boat..."""