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Joke of the Day

"Why are fish only happy inside? They have in-door fins"

"All of my horoscopes lately have started with ""Ok, don't freak out but..."""

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? You can't milk a cow for 14 years... I'm going to hell."

"I saw my friend at the pool today for the first time in a long time and I said... Hey! WATER you doing here?"

"Why doesn't Magneto wear his old costume anymore? Because days of fuchsia passed"

"I want to get back on the merry go round... ...but I'll need a moment of inertia."

"[first date] GIRL: When you said ""fitness freak"" in your profile, this isn't what I expected HALF-MAN/HALF-TREADMILL: It was an old photo"

"I like my women the way I like my software Without any viruses and I don't have to pay"

"What begins with E, ends with E, and has one letter? envelope"

"How do you know when there's a lead singer at the door? The knocking is all out of rhythm, they can't find the key, and they never know when to come in!"