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Joke of the Day

"MY DATE WHO IS A SQUID: What movie should we see? ME, SECRETLY TRYING TO HARVEST HER INK: Something super scary *I empty my popcorn bucket*"

"Why dont applebees employees wear watches? Cuz theres a clock on the microwave"

"Knock Knock Who's there? Eat mop"

"How did Popeye buy long sleeve shirts?"

"A photon checks into a hotel.. The bellhop asks, ""Can I help you with your luggage?"" The photon replies, ""I don't have any, I'm traveling light."""

"Whenever I'm in a difficult situation, I think, ""What would I do?"" so I can do the opposite thing"

"What do Bernie Sanders supporters call their parents? Roommates"

"I'm just a few smartphone apps away from never having to talk to anyone again."

"Where does Ubisoft have the most trouble in school The Division"

"Time = Money because you SPEND it!"