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Joke of the Day
"Can you believe that my neighbor knocked at my door at 2AM!? Luckily, I was up playing my drums."
Next Joke
"If I had a gun and 2 bullets and I was alone in a room with you, Hitler, and Stalin, I'd look at you like how the fuck did we get in this situation."
"[2 years after going missing at zoo] wife: [points at TV] ""omg thats him"" me: [on the news inside kangaroos pouch] ""why is noone helping me"""
"On $15 I could travel the world.. of Warcraft"
"mermaids swim by twerking do you ever just think about that"
"Yoda: A Jedi, you will not be. Train Chewbacca, I will. Luke: But why? Yoda: Better piggyback rides, he gives."
"Did you hear Rolf Harris is dyslexic? rofl"
"A Trump supporter asked an opponent what the candidate should do for the American taxpayer. The opponent laughed and said, ""How about becoming one himself?"""
"Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants? Incase he gets a hole in one"
"What did Mitt Romney say to C3P0? Threepio, hand me those binders, willya?"