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Joke of the Day

"A Higgs boson walks into a Catholic church... The priest says, ""Hey hey hey, you're not allowed here."" The Higgs boson says, ""But without me, there would be no mass."""

"Somewhere, a ninja watches ""I Didn't Know I was Pregnant."" An imperceptible smile creeps across his lips. ""Damn right you didn't."""

"I want to be a pharmacist just so I can yell ""Now take these suppositories and shove'em straight up your ass!"""

"The Ukrainian government is opening up a tourist attraction in Chernobyl. It will be like Disney World, except the six foot tall mouse is real."

"#rubbishjokes How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None - it's a hardware problem."

"I don't care if you're here to murder me we take our shoes off in this house."

"Hitler was a keen golfer..... He even wrote a book on it, it was titled 'How to get out of a bunker with one shot.'"

"So I got rid of my gym membership... just didn't work out "

"There are three types of people in the world Those who can count, and those who can't"

"This guy.. igg.me/at/bustofabney Why is this a thing??"