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Joke of the Day

"I used to have a steering wheel in my pants But it was driving me nuts"

"I wonder what people who type ""u"" instead of ""you"" do with all their free time?"

"What bone will a dog never eat a trombone"

"What's the difference between an Iraqi middle school and a terrorist training camp? Fuck if I know, I just fly the drone."

"How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies don't have the motor skills or the depth perception to change a light bulb."

"He leans in, looks into my eyes, and lowers the lights. I go in for the kiss. And now I'm being escorted out of the opticians."

"""I'm independent"" Said the Jamaican, showing me his initialised necklace."

"BEST PICK UP LINE: I wasn't looking at your boobs, I was staring into your heart...no, I lied , your boobs are awesome."

"I can't wait to get one of those self-driving cars to watch my wife argue with it."

"An Eskimo is holidaying in New Zealand.. His car breaks down. A Kiwi stops to help, opens the bonnet, and says ""Bro, you've blown a seal"" To which the Eskimo responds ""so what mate, you fuck sheep!"""