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Joke of the Day

"I'm worried about my girlfriend recently... I'm always worried if shes eating well, sleeping well, or if she exists at all."

"I tried taking Viagara the other day... I must not have swallowed it fast enough, because man oh man was my neck stiff!"

"Penguins are scientist by nature... They always have to improve their slides !"

"Why do black people hate chainsaws Because when you start them they go run nigga nigga nigga"

"[Doctor's Office] Doctor: The bad news is you have 3 months to live. Me: What's the good news? Doctor: You should make it til Shark Week"

"Only God can judge me. *gets hit by lightning*"

"A Sadist and a Masochist are walking down the street. The Masochist says, ""Hit me."" The Sadist says, ""No."""

"I figured out why we abbreviate BlowJob with BJ 'cuz it's a mouthful"

"Two Irish homosexuals Michael Fitzpatrick & Patrick Fitzmichael"

"Why doesn't Ann Coulter have children? You can't make babies by fucking an asshole."