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Joke of the Day

"Why can't bikes stand up on their own? They are two tired."

"How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A fish."

"Clinton Campaign Hillary's Clinton's response to allegations of receiving money from foreign governments to fund her campaign: ""I did NOT have financial relations with those countries!"""

"Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? She threw away all of the W's."

"Q: What did the mermaid do last Saturday night? A: She went out with the tide."

"Why are LED's a good investment? Because they always diode."

"What is the definition of a caterpillar ? A worm in a fur coat !"

"Where there is a will, there is usually a death."

"The truth will set you free. Unless Chuck Norris has you, in which case, forget it buddy!"

"COP: drop the gun CRIMINAL: no COP: [flipping through police handbook, whispers to partner] it doesnt say what to do if he says no"