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Joke of the Day

"The American stock market is a bear BULL shit"

"Whats the worst part of breaking up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message."

"I hate mosquitoes, they're like nature's version of a Jehovah's Witness.........."

"I told my mom I got in trouble at school today for a PDA.... She said, ""For what? Kissing your teacher's ass?"""

"What do you call a yellow Oreo? An orienteo!"

"Don't use up the last of the milk! Leave just enough in there to piss somebody off."

"Kids: Dad why have you never taken us swimming [thinking of an excuse because I can't swim] Me: I got killed by a shark once"

"Is there any Indian left? No, there's naan left."

"I'm glad I've got boobs. The last thing I want is people making eye contact with me."

"What is the difference between a zebra and a bar? Zebras have bars around their asshole, and there are assholes around the bars."