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Joke of the Day
"What's the matter? Hydrogen, mostly."
Next Joke
"I should probably eat this entire bag of Oreos tonight since they're going to expire in 2017."
"Children Are Hereditary Children are hereditary... if your parents were not able to have any children, chances are you won't be able to either."
"I was out with my bf and a waiter called me a 'cradle robber' cuz he's 18 and I'm 43. Totally ruined our 10th anniversary."
"Barack Obama and Mitt Romney are both on a sinking ship... Barack Obama and Mitt Romney are both on a sinking ship; both of them are drowning. Who gets saved?!? The answer: AMERICA!!!"
"What do you call a sick Pokemon? Pikachoo"
"Calling 911 Hello 911 I'd like to report murder, this bitch killed my vibe"
"Why was the jacket stinky? Because it was a windbreaker."
"Two cannibals are eating Amy Schumer The first cannibal asks ""Does it taste funny?"" The second cannibal turns around and says ""nope."""
"How can you make a basset hound fast? Take away its food!"