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Joke of the Day
"You could sell the cure for Ebola to Gamestop and they'd still only give you $4.99 for it"
Next Joke
"I know where you live In a house"
"A guy is with a hot girl and gets a boner Girl: Is that a weapon in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Guy: Both, it's a weapon of ass destruction."
"A surprise Hunger Games competition for everyone who makes eye contact with me today in the office."
"I used to think I could control ducks with my mind but it turns out ducks & I just have very similar ideas about what stuff ducks should do"
"How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American? Last Supper"
"What is Marios favorite type of pants? Denim Denim Denim"
"What do bees and celebrities have in common? They're both dying at an alarming rate."
"Do you know why one side of the V Is slightly larger when birds fly together? Because there are more birds on that side."
"""Oh, just a scotch."" The bartender says, ""what can I get for you?"" A tachyon walks into a bar."