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Joke of the Day
"I like my coffee like I like my women. Without some other guy's dick in it."
Next Joke
"What's a woman ideal husband? An archaeologist. The older she gets the more interested he becomes."
"Somewhere in an alternative universe a girl is kissing a frog hoping it turns back into her charming prince but instead it only turns into the artist formerly known as prince"
"Interviewer: ""Are you good at making snap decisions?"" *20 minutes later* Me: ""No."""
"Two fathers and two sons went duck hunting. Each shot a duck but they shot only three ducks in all. How come? The hunters were a man his son and his grandson."
"I heard Iran is supposed to do well at the olympics this year They're the bomb"
"I'm so committed to pizza that I've stopped wearing a condom when I eat it."
"BMW What is the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? A porcupine has the pricks on the outside."
"Before kids: I'd choose going blind over going deaf. After kids: Deaf! I wanna be deaf!"
"A horror movie with all black people lmao ""Ayo what's going down in ya basement?"" ""That ain't my business"" ""I feel ya"" *Rolls credits*"