65199

Joke of the Day

"Just Netflixed ""2012."" Six Billion people dead at film's end. Was prepared because PG-13 rating warned of ""Mild Violence"""

"50 years from now...""Remember that time we were fighting the riot police and the National Guard ..."" ""...and your mommy shows up and kicks your ASS?"""

"""Knock knock"" ""Who's there?"" ""Dave"" ""Dave who?"" Dave had to hold back tears as he realised his mother's Alzheimer's is getting worse"

"NSFW don't read if your easily offended. Why don't black people like to dream. Because the last black guy to have a dream died."

"Why don't priests like people having sex while standing? It might lead to dancing"

"What do you get if you cross a dick with a potato? A dictator."

"I saw a woman breastfeeding her baby on the bus today... And the lady beside me started freaking out. In retrospect, it probably wasn't the best time for a wank."

"How can you tell when your girlfriend is getting fat? She starts fitting into your wife's clothes."

"There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator Only a fraction of you will find this funny"

"I totally baby-proofed my house, but one still got in."