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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Americans and yogurt? If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years it'll grow a culture"

"What kind of money do polar bears use ? Ice lolly !"

"Where does a pirate keep his gold? In his treas-arrrr chest!"

"A salesman knocked on my door today. ""Who currently provides your Internet?"" he asked. I said, ""My next door neighbour."""

"What is a runner's favourite subject in school ? Jog-raphy !"

"What do you call a vampire junkie? Count Drugula."

"They're marketing headphones specifically for gorillas now Rumor has it they'll be called Harambeats. I'm so sorry."

"I'm currently on two different diets Because with just one I'm always hungry"

"Anyone looking for a job should consider becoming an elephant circumsiser... ... the pay isn't too great, but the tips are enormous!"

"4-year-old: What happens when you die? Me: You go to heaven. 4: No, I mean when you die, do I get your stuff?"