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Joke of the Day

"The guy behind me at the grocery store only had energy drinks, root beer & gummie lifesavers, so I asked how far into assassins creed he was"

"My doctor made me do a urine test for fun. It was a piss-take."

"A priest, a child molester, and an alcoholic, walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy."

"I walked into a bar the other day... ...ouch"

"Spank me once, shame on you. Spank me twice, now we're getting somewhere."

"difference between a crow and a raven one has 4 pinion feathers and the other has 5 pinion feathers, so the difference is a matter of a pinion"

"Put the punchline in the title. Jokes suck when people"

"My thoughts on the French Revolution Great concept, terrible execution."

"Don't let people tell you that life after college is nothing but being poor and tired. It's 100% true, but it's more fun if it's a surprise."

"Just bought a 2013 calender, a rope and a stool. I like to keep the store clerk guessing."