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Joke of the Day
"What has 75 balls and screws old ladies? Bingo!"
Next Joke
"I have a nightlight flashlight...I can only see in the dark for 2 seconds in 10 second intervals"
"... AND IT WORKS!!! I just invented a time travel machine..."
"Constipated people don't give a crap."
"Why did the gay scarecrows get divorced after their surrogate mother aborted their IVF baby on obamacare? The whole thing was one big straw man argument."
"What do monkeys drink in space? Orangu-Tang."
"How did the terminal cancer patient do in school? He passed."
"Apple should make a sarcasm font and call it the iRoll."
"What key opens a banana? A monkey. What key opens a carrot? A donkey."
"Knock Knock St. Patricks Day edition. Knock knock. Who's there? Irish. Irish who? Irish you would open the door I'm freezing out here!"