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Joke of the Day
"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle His wife is already pregnant"
Next Joke
"Why did the hot dog vendor cry? He burned his wiener"
"I'm at my classiest when my date rips my bra off and cookie crumbs fall out"
"Why don't old women ever have sex? ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese sandwich?"
"i'm not ""cute"" awkward. i'm ""what the hell is wrong with you"" awkward."
"If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death."
"Arguing with autocorrect is the new yelling at the television."
"Me: For my 1st wish I want a box of Triscuits Genie:Are u sure? U can buy them at any store Me:My 2nd wish is for u to mind ur own business"
"Three words to hurt a mans ego? ""Is it in?"""
"Now accepting applications for a new best friend. Must be willing to let me put my fingers in your mouth. No Mexicans. No skanks. Por favor."