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Joke of the Day

"I used to be opposed to organ transplant... But after having one done myself; I guess I've had a change of heart."

"What do you give to an elephant with diarrhea? Plenty of room."

"I don't think people understand the potential ramifications when they say to me ""just be yourself""."

"I want to buy a Prius because I plan on driving off of a cliff & I don't want to make too big of an explosion & kill squirrels or turtles"

"Which street in France do reindeer live on? Rue Dolph"

"Teacher: Didn't you know the bell had gone? Fred: I didn't take it Miss."

"hey tomorrow you could be hit in the head by a block of cheese so frickin live ur life today before you have to wear ice on ur head tomorrow"

"I don't understand why some snacks are ""fun-sized"", there's really nothing ""fun"" about having a smaller portion of food."

"What do you call two guys using the same urinal? Peers"

"What kind of cell phone doesn't have a lock? A Nokia"