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Joke of the Day

"I like the lack of controversy over the Olympic men's figure skating ""No Need to Ask, We'll Tell!"" policy."

"What award did the kid in a coma for six weeks win? Atrophy."

"What's the best part about a selfie stick? You don't have to look far to find something to beat the user of one in the head."

"How are Harambe memes keeping up? Cincinnati Zoo keeps trying to shoot them down. Edit: Spelling"

"How many ways are there to please a guy? Three way."

"I can remember my first day at school The teacher looked at me during register and asked, ""Are you chewing?"" I said, ""No, chewing is probably one of the foreign kids, my name is David."""

"What do you say to someone who just uttered a tired, old reddit catch-phrase? ""I see what you did there"""

"This guy went for an interview with Buzzfeed What happened next will shock you"

"""Surely EVERYONE pisses in the shower?"" I protest as I'm dragged out of Ikea"

"""Uno, dos..."" And just like that, the Spanish magician was gone without a tres."