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Joke of the Day

"New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual."

"Why is a divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it."

"Why is six afraid of seven... Because seven is a registered six offender."

"Robin: ""Let me drive the Batmobile!"" Batman: ""Never. I'd rather let Superman."" *wall breaks down* Superman: ""OMG really??"" Batman: ""No."""

"What are the pigs warned to look out for in New York? Pigpockets."

"Excuse me girlfriend for I have burped. It has been 3 weeks since my last apology"

"Your ass must get jealous of all the crap that comes out of your mouth!"

"What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? I dunno, but you should see that son of a bitch hang dry wall."

"I have Capri Sun and pudding in my fridge which proves I'm four or poor."

"The day I decided I wanted to do drugs Was the day I saw your crack"