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Joke of the Day

"What did one orphan say to the other? ""Robin, get in the Batmobile."""

"[preppin for rap battle] *pops retainer out* dont wanna give him any ammunition *takes off suspenders* that should do it *rollerblades away*"

"Chivalry is so not dead. Most guys ask where you want it when they cum."

"If there is ever a corn army, I'll join it... ...and I'll be the colonel."

"Just saw a shooting star. The crime in this galaxy is getting out of hand."

"""But I need braaaaaaains!"" ~A frustrated zombie at a Trump rally"

"I was flipping through the channels.... and my wife asked was on the TV. I said ""dust"" And that's how the fight started."

"Ah yes. I've linked my Twitter to my Wordpress, and my LinkedIn to Klout. Now it's time to interface my Acura ILX with a giant redwood"

"Sex positions for small penises Fuck! This isn't Google search. How do I delete this post?"

"According to the bloodwork I had done at my doctor's office, I'm 12 percent cake."