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Joke of the Day

"What runs, but never sprints? Inherited obesity"

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"Five emos in a room A study has shown that if you put five emos in a room, one of them will eventually kill himself because he wont have a corner to cry in."
"Women are kinda like engines. You gotta show them a little TLC to get all your money's worth out of them, and every now you have to choke them to get them to turnover."
"How do you chip thin ice off a window? You bust a rime."
"Why did Santa bring his sack with him when starring in the pantomime? He wanted to have some stage presents."
"Did you know that national middle child day was last week? Yeah... Nobody else did either..."
"I only use shampoo that smells like raspberries so people don't think it's weird when I have jam in my hair."
"I bet Usher shows everyone to their seats at his concerts."
"You should never take what a sea monsters says seriously. They're always Kraken jokes."
"If you're a registered sex offender, do you get a discount?"