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Joke of the Day

"What would you get if you crossed a dinosaur with a pig? Jurassic pork!"

"What do you call a homeless guy who broke up with his girlfriend a while ago? A man who hasn't eaten in days."

"Probably the third-best reason to have kids is if you think it's funny when other people trip."

"Honey you're like my GPS... I'd be lost without you."

"I'm no different than any other bachelor. I put my pants on one leg at a time and clean the house once every new girlfriend."

"Guess who's been sober for 10 months? Robin Williams."

"What do you call someone who hates people without toes and can't have ice cream? Lack-toes intolerant"

"Did you hear about the argumentative skunk? He always liked to make a stink!"

"I was going to tell you this joke about Matthew Shepard... ...but I'm kind of on the fence about it."

"UNICORN: I love the forest! I love my horn! Life is wonderf [Pegasus flies over chased by babes] UNICORN: God why have you forsaken me"