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Joke of the Day

"When someone tells me they're a doctor or an engineer all I can think is: ""wow your parents must've yelled at you to do your homework a lot"""

"The Pope walks into a Mosque. The imam says ""Why the wrong faith?"""

"I'm a big fan of wood. Mahogany. Cherry. Walnut. Morning."

"Why did the Dollar note become 4 Quarters? Because it wanted ""to change"". *ducks*"

"That redheaded snowboarder is pretty good, but he could be even better if he did some of his wacky prop comedy on the slopes."

"""Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor""- John joyfully sings as he walks off with the 'Caution: wet floor' sign"

"My boss is so inappropriate at work Whenever there's an opportunity for innuendo he slips it in"

"Always check the height of nearby ceiling fans before giving a toddler a ride on your shoulders... * How I learned this rule is not important."

"I buy all my guns from a guy called T-Rex He's a small arms dealer"

"HOW I DRESS FOR UNIVERSITY First day of the week: brad pitt Last day of the week: homeless druggie"