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Joke of the Day

"What did the computer say to the pirate? Want to date hot Russians!"

"who needs people when you got pizza"

"Clean Jokes... ...Are hard to cum by."

"18 years ago today, Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum saved our country and our PLANET from an alien invasion. Never forget"

"R.I.P Dense Water Vapour. You will always be mist."

"How do you circumcise a hillbilly ? Kick his sister in the jaw"

"There are 2 types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data."

"[Ouija board] O spirits, let me talk to m- C-O-N-N-E-C-T-I-N-G C-O-N-N-E-C-T-I-N-G C-O-N-N-E-C-T-I *squints* What the heck? A 3G board?"

"$100 Bill A: Why are you late? B: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. A: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? B: No, I was standing on it."

"What do the Starship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? They both fly around Uranus wiping off Klingons"