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Joke of the Day

"thank you all for donating to my gofundme to pay for my surgery; I have decided to buy 600 playstations with the money"

"(NSFW) What did Isaac Newton's penis say to him when he first saw a girl's boobs ? Fuck your Gravity law man, I'm goin' up."

"How many hillbillies does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. A man, his wife, and his cousin"

"In the south, you're either ghetto, or a farmer. You can't be both, otherwise... *It's racism.*"

"The best time to reexamine your life is when you find yourself reluctantly nodding to the questions asked at the start of an infomercial."

"Authorized, Bona Fide, Established... those are some Legit synonyms."

"Me: Did you have a shirt on when you said it? Wife: I was naked, just out of the shower. Me: And you expected me to remember what you said?"

"Have you ever eaten ethiopian food? No? Them neither"

"Bought the cheapest possible Mercedes yesterday 'cause I needed to use the bathroom at the dealership."

"Click to see something special something special"