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Joke of the Day

"Angelina Jolie needs to take some time off her busy schedule of feeding the hungry and poor in third world countries and feed herself for a change."

"Police Chief: There has been a car hi on Seventh Street Police Officer: Don't you mean a hijack? Chief: No, he had an iPhone 7"

"Just got a Hyundai Accent and now I sound like a Korean guy."

"What do you get when 1000 politicians have an idea? A dim light."

"Two things I learned from online dating geography and disappointment"

"Which president was famous for his long pauses? Ellipsis S. Grant."

"[NSFW] I am no gynecologist.... But I know a cunt when I see one"

"""Que?"" (Spanish Inquisition)"

"I have a step ladder its a nice ladder, but I wish I knew my real ladder."

"A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly. Suddenly, Lorraine died. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, ""I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."""