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Joke of the Day

"What do the ninja turtles say when bad guys ask them where they learnt to fight Master splinter tortoise"

"I like my women like I like my fish. An irregular plural."

"Why did the pig walk into the kitchen? Because he felt like bacon. :P"

"What do monkeys sing at Christmas ? Jungle Bells Jungle bells.. !"

"How do we know for sure that Darth Vader isn't black? Because he keeps on saying ""I am your father"""

"What do we want? Apathy! When do we want it? Oh, you know, whenever."

"I want to write a book called ""Variably Orgasming Man"" So people ask me how's ""Variably Orgasming Man"" coming?"

"A one-legged and a blind man are arguing The one-legged man says: ""I'm gonna kick your ass!"". The blind man replies: ""Sure, I'd like to see that!"""

"I had a dream that I killed all the dumb shirtless guys with 'swag' and their duckfaced girlfriends. It was the Yolocaust."

"Why wasn't the Canadian scared at the movie theater? He knew Nunavut was real."