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Joke of the Day

"A teacher and the students Teacher: What does the chicken give you? Students: eggs! Teacher: What does the pig give you? Students: bacon! Teacher: What does the cow give you? Students: homework!"

"Daddy! Tell me a story.. The Tooth Fairy is really a wicked witch, who takes all your teeth if you sleep with your mouth open. Good night."

"I'm blonde. What's your excuse?"

"I'm looking for a book on lack of empathy', I asked the librarian. Do I look like I give a fcuk?', he snapped. ""Yes, that's the one', I said."

"I just bought sunglasses off of the black market The trade was very shady."

"Whenever someone asks me to sign their cast, I always write: last warning, you have a week to get the money together."

"Why did the two chicken crossed the road? Because The Hound wanted to eat both of them."

"How do al-Qaeda like their toast? Bean-laden"

"I don't get why women are complaining that Plan B doesn't work if you're over 180 lbs If she's over 180 lbs, she's already Plan B!"

"What do you call a serial killing cannibal who catches on fire easily? Flammable Lector."