6176

Joke of the Day

"My work ethic could best be described as ""procrastinate as much as possible then frantically scream OH FUCK right before the deadline."""

"what's the opposite of a Mexican? a Mexican't"

"Why is the mens bathroom such an angry place? It's where all the pricks hang out."

"What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common? They both contain high amounts of trans fats."

"how do you make a dog go ""meow""? Freeze it solid then push it through a band saw. MEEEOOW!"

"A guy walks into a bar... He says ""ouch!"" and grabs his forehead."

"Let's make a deal. You sing Christmas music in the office and I'll leave 5 minutes early to let the air out of your tires. Deal?"

"Why isn't suntanning an olympic sport? Because the best you can ever get is bronze."

"You Shook Me All Night Long is a great song that also describes what I do to my husband when he's snoring."

"What is a religious gorilla called? A monk-ey"