61584

Joke of the Day

"How does AVON find so many women willing to take orders ?"

"A snake walks into a bar And the bartender yells, ""How the fuck did you just walk in here?!"""

"Trying to talk to a girl without staring at her boobs is like trying to poop without peeing."

"Why didn't the two tampons talk to each other? Because they were stuck up bitches."

"At bedtime I read my daughter a few of my favorite RTs, tuck her in & whisper, ""This is why we don't talk to strangers on the internet."""

"My mother in law called me today and said? ""Come quick. I think I'm dying"" I said, ""Call me back when you're sure""."

"Muslim extremists have crashed a speedboat into the Thames barrier in London... Police think it might be the early start of Ram-a-dam."

"I was overcharged by a plumber! So, I've been secretly training a gorilla to roll barrels at people. Tomorrow, we're kidnapping his girl."

"I thought reverse psychology was when you made your therapist cry"

"My girlfriend is sick of me pretending that I'm a lockpicker. Girlfriend: ""I'm sick of you pretending you're a lockpicker. We should break it off."" Me: ""But then it might get stuck inside the lock!"""